2 hours in the ER later...

Gyven's left eyebrow has a lovely gash sealed with liquid stitches. I still don't know what he did (there's no blood anywhere or damage to any furniture, and he can't seem to articulate what he did), but he sure did jolt me into action when he came up to me with his face covered in blood (and said very quietly "I need a dand-daid")! He was very brave, too, and we went to McDonald's after he was discharged because he asked so nicely.